#Mind Like A Diamond|Karen Page

[tarnishedhalo]

“Why are your eyes so…red?” Karen

Jurassic Memes || -

Maybe it's the fact that it took him a full three minutes to work up the gumption to pull himself off the couch to answer the door, or the fact that he'd smiled with full teeth on display that he almost never does ~a habit in common with his sister~ or...a host of other hazy things he doesn't quite hold onto try as much as he does to think about them. He stands aside to let her in, closing the door behind her, then makes his way back to the couch where he half sits, half collapses under his own weight. "If you're keeping this off the record, I'm gonna have to go with...'because I'm high as fuck right now' or if you prefer....allergies."

Karen knows Riley isn't allergic to anything. The wince when he puts his leg back up on the cushions, a habit because it isn't even the one made of flesh and bone tells her more than he will about the phantom nerve pain.

"I'm...I'm sorry. Shouldn'a said that. But I'm glad to see you. What's up?"

[darlingshane]

7 Days of Kastle

Day 1: The Last Job

Pairing: Frank Castle/Karen Page.

Other Characters: Several characters from DD and TPS mentioned.

Content: Thieves AU.

Warnings: Two spicy lines at the end, nothing too crazy.

Word Count: 675

Prompt: Thief (from the free prompts list)

Summary: Frank and Karen are ready to retire but before that, they decide to assemble the team one last time to steal a blue diamond.

Frank and Karen are ready to put this life behind them before it catches up with them. They were never in for the money or the luxury, though that was a bonus, the excitement of outsmarting and stealing from the rich was more appealing than anything else. Now, they wanna travel the world, visit the places they’ve never been to, and then settle somewhere. Karen is dying to go to Greece. Frank just wanna be where she is, he’d happily live in a trashcan in the middle of nowhere if she’d ask.

For their last job, they chose to steal a particular jewel that Mr. Fisk had eyes set on for years– a blue diamond from The Russo Collection. The one that was kept beneath several different layers of security, each more intricate than the previous one, at his mansion.

It was months of work and rehearsal. A hell of a curtain call for them and their team. They couldn’t have pulled it off without– Dinah, master in persuasion, who had the pleasure of having to date Billy The Beaut just to get his fingerprints and keep his mind occupied in other matters. David, hacker extraordinaire, a little chaotic but always reliable, enjoyed the challenge of messing up Mr. Russo’s high end security. And Amy, a highly gifted safecracker, young and ambitious, great at improvising on the spot, and a little cocky for her sake, but that comes with her young age.

The plan had its challenges but it was a success. They replaced the diamond with a fake and by the time someone realizes it’s not the authentic one, they’ll be long gone. Obviously, every loose end was tied before parting, assuring themselves that there was nothing left behind that could link the robbery to them. Their team did a great job and they earned a good cut out of it.

Now, Frank and Karen await for their ultimate bounty in Wilson Fisk’s Penthouse. 

They’ve dressed for the occasion, both in black, her in a dress, him in a suit with a tie. 

Frank takes off his sunglasses and opens the suitcase that holds the ostentatious diamond. He doesn’t take his eyes off it while Fisk’s right hand, Mr. Wesley, appraises the valuable jewel.

“It’s gonna make an interesting brooch for Mr. Fisk,” Frank quips.

Karen’s lips quirk up from her seat on the couch, taking a one last look at the beautiful view out the giant windows.

She stands up when Fisk comes into the room, greeting them with his signature stoic indifference and checks directly with his associate. The only emotion he shows is when he holds the diamond up to the sun to observe the crisp rays creating all short of beautiful lights before his eyes.

“Are you sure you want to retire? You two have a gift. It’d be a shame to waste it like that.”

Frank and Karen look at each other, “we’re sure.”

“Well, in that case, Ms. Page, Mr. Castle, it was a pleasure doing business with you,” he motions at Mr. Wesley, who opens a laptop and starts typing a few numbers, transferring the plentiful amount of 5 million to their account. 

Then, he hands them an envelope, “your new identities as requested.”

“Thank you,” Karen takes the envelope and they both shake his hand before heading out.

Frank’s arm curls around her waist as they step into the elevator, pulling her back flush against him so he can kiss her exposed neck as the doors slide closed.

She flinches at the tickle of his neatly trimmed beard, her hand smoothing the sleeve of his blazer.

“Where to now, Mr. Castle?”

“The Plaza.”

“The Plaza?”

“Yeah, just for a couple nights. You and me, room service, a bed, a tub…” his hand slips under the hem of her skirt, pushing the fabric up as his palm slides up over the plane of her thigh, “you out of this dress.”

“Hmm,” she presses her ass against him, as his fingers reach her panties, “I like that plan.”

A/N: This is part of a drabble collection that I wrote for @daredevilexchange​‘s Fan Week. I’ll be posting one a day until January 9. They're all different au’s and situations featuring Frank and Karen that I’ve always wanted to write. I hope you like these :)

[transmasc-wizard]

(princeofthecactus here! hello)

ooooh, for the end of year reading asks: 4, 13 and 17 please!!!

hi!! ty for the ask!

4: Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

Yes! Kayla Ancrum, Casey McQuiston, Neil Gaiman (don't @ me i know i'm late to the party), Aiden Thomas, Emery Lee, Karen M McManus, Steven Salvatore, V.E. Schwab, and (though I'm still reading her book) Chloe Gong.

13: What were your least favorite books of the year?

I must admit I typically purge books I hated from my mind, but a look back at the extremely excessive list of stats I kept track of in word graphs (yes i'm That Guy) says they were Ingrid Lee's Dog Lost (fucking hated that. 200 pages of uselessness), My Life as a Diamond by an author i don't remember (cis woman writes about What Its Like To Be Trans), Maniac Magee by the stargirl guy (just fucking terrible on all levels), AND

THE ULTIMATE MOTHERFUCKER

THE BOOK I TECHNICALLY READ LAST YEAR BUT BRIEFLY SKIMMED A COUPLE PAGES OF THIS YEAR SO WILL COUNT ANYWAY BECAUSE I HATE IT SO MUCH

FUCKING CHRIS COLFER'S A TALE OF MAGIC

seriously. my goodreads review for that fucker (which i will not be dropping bc my goodreads account has my real email) is, like, a mile long. I could talk about how much i hate it (and his Land of Stories series) until i run out of breath and die.

17: Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

yes! Steven Salvatore's Can't Take That Away, Jasper Sanchez's The (Un)Popular Vote, Jaida Jones' Master of One, Kayla Ancrum's Darling (i don't often read thriller), and basically every contemporary I read and liked because before this year i hated most contemporaries.

ty again and have a great day/night/timezone time!

[strangesigils]

What happened at work?

Sorry for the late response! But oh boy do I have a story (and yeah I’m currently looking for a new job because tbh I haven’t been this unhealthy and miserable since I lived in ontario)

SO my manager is on vacation, which honestly she needs it because she’s been running herself ragged, that’s not in itself directly the problem.

But the thing is we have a number of regular guests at my hotel that come in for work that have set negotiated prices they worked out directly with my manager, one guest in particular is a well-known for being particular about details he likes to play mind games with all the staff. He’s more than kind of a Karen to paint a good picture for yall. He’s very particular about his room pricing, because he’s a diamond level wyndham member. Him and my manager had a rate of $80 worked out for his special room even before covid hit, the condition was he would book through us instead of third party with this price so he got a good price and we didn’t have to pay commission on top of it. Seems reasonable enough, we do that with a number of specific guests. Well right before my manager left for her vacation she ordered us to change his rate from $80 to $90 right before his next stay. Didn’t call him to let him know, and didn’t leave us a reason to give him when he would check in. And it’s not like she didn’t know he would put up a fuss, we’ve run into this problem with him before, he always demands to talk one-on-one with the manager whenever details with his reservation are changed, and he’s known for giving staff a hard time in general.

So naturally, my coworker checks him in right before my shift, and he raises a stink over it (this unfortunate coworker is new to front desk and hadn’t had to deal with him before, poor thing) but he has to go eat right after so she only had to deal with hi for about 20 minutes or so. Then comes my shift. I must have spent at least half my shift on-and-off arguing with this guy about the rate change, talking out of my ass on any theory I can come up with on why his rate was changed and apologizing for the situation, and naturally he’s pissed he can’t talk to the manager so he’s taking it out on me.

His usual threat is that he’ll start booking third party again to make us pay commission, but not this time. He threatens to switch hotels for the rest of the season (which is slow season already for us and we’re looking at the reality that people are gunna get laid off again as it is). So I make a judgement call, negotiating with guests is a part of the job, so I change his rate back to $80 because it’ll cost us more in the long run to lose a regular during this season than it will to just give him the price he wants. Plus my attitude is that if my manager wants his rate up so bad she should have AT LEAST left us a verifiable reason or argument in our Communication Book to present to him before she left instead of throwing us to the wolves.  So I write in the communication book what went down, that I changed his rate back, and why I did it. Keep in mind this book is commonly used for passive-aggressive messages,  and dumb page-long rants over minor mistakes between staff which is another reason why I hate it here. So I come into work the next day to see if there’s anything important I need to know about in the communication book for my shift (which is standard practice), and there’s a reply to my note from the morning shift person (who’s never had to check this guy in even once as far as I’m aware). She wrote in the margin beside my note “oHhHH [Mangers Name] iS GUnNa LovE yOU WhEN sHE ComEs bACk aND fINDs ouT YoU DIsobEYED A dIREct oRDEr”

And honestly, with the almost non-stop verbal assualt from guests since covid hit, and my physical and mental health going downhill from the irregular overnight shifts, the stress from financial problems I’ve run into from having my hours cut without warning the past month, it’s like I could almost hear a cracking noise in my brain from that stupid comment. I almost walked out right then and there. So I’ve decided I need to find a new job before I end up strangling a customer or a coworker. It’s cool when you get the random super cool customer that tips you with a joint but it don’t make up for this non-stop crap.

So that’s what happened at work

[dreamwritesimagines]

Once A Year 16- Unexpected [Billy Russo x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your patience my loves! Here’s the finale! <3 Your messages make my day, please keep them coming! <3

Summary: Sometimes, fairytales end differently.

Characters: Billy Russo x Reader, Frank Castle x Karen Page

Warning: Explicit language, abuse, violence, dysfunctional relationships, cheating, murder. As usual, I don’t condone any of the messed up stuff happening on the show or in this story.

Word Count: 2862

Due to the linking issue, the previous chapters are on my masterlist<3

You really hated funerals.

Except for this one. This one, somehow, gave you a rush of relief. He was gone, locked away in a coffin, never to leave, never to find you ever again.

“Aldrich Killian was a successful businessman.” The priest said “But more than that, he was compassionate.”

Right. Keep talking about shit you don’t know, buddy.

You kept your eyes on the coffin, barely paying attention to the speech, or the way Carter looked almost frozen, blinking so hard as if trying not to cry.

Closed casket funeral.

Happens when you leave a corpse for almost a month.

Fits you, asshole, you thought, And hey, who could’ve thought those crime shows were right, huh? The killer always attends the funeral.

“He was taken from us by a cruel twist of fate,” the priest said and you tried to keep your expression stable.

Not exactly true, is it Aldrich? I took your life. I ended you. I made you suffer, just like I promised myself back then.

And there’s nothing you can do about it.

Your phone buzzed in your purse but you ignored it, still staring at the coffin.

“In times like these, it may be hard not to lose faith.” he said, “But we all know that those who were responsible for it will face justice.

It had been almost too easy to frame Billy’s ex boss Rawlins. Now it wasn’t only Billy and Frank but also the police were looking for him, and you were almost proud of yourself for coming up with that idea. Two birds with one stone.

Or better yet, two bodies with one bullet.

Ah well.

Carter took a shaky breath beside you, and you stole a look at him, then squeezed his arm in a supporting manner.

“And it is important to keep in mind that Aldrich Carter will be remembered.”

No he won’t be. I made sure of that.

Finally, they started to lower the casket into the grave and you pursed your lips to make sure you weren’t smiling, and soon enough, people started to go back to their cars. You checked your phone, then looked up at Carter.

“Hey,”

“Thank you for coming,” he muttered, “I know it must’ve been hard for you.”

You smiled slightly, “I’m here for you Carter, not him.”

Liar liar…

“To think that the last thing I told him was….” Carter trailed off, then shook his head, “Anyway. I know he was a terrible person, his death doesn’t change or excuse what he did to you.”

You shrugged slightly, then started walking beside him slowly.

“So um- how have you been?”

“I’m good,” you nodded, “I’ve been pretty busy lately.”

“Yeah, I heard you sold the gallery.” Carter said “I thought you liked that place.”

“I did. I do. It’s just-“ you heaved a sigh, “I think a clean slate will be good for me.”

“So what will you do now?”

“Early retirement.” You joked, making him smile, “I don’t know. I’m going away for a while actually. I’m- I think I’ll make a home for myself somewhere.”

“I thought New York was home for you.”

“I don’t really think home is an actual place for me anymore.”

He hmmed, “Billy then?” he asked, “I assume he’s coming with you?”

You nodded again as you reached your car, “Yeah. He is.”

Carter thought for a moment, “Are you happy, Y/N?”

You didn’t even stop to think, your answer was natural and for the first time in your life, sincere.

“Yeah,” you said, “I am. Weird, huh?”

Carter tried to smile, “Nah not weird, just good.”

“And you?”

“Ah, you know,” Carter shrugged, “I’m just…trying to be.”

“Carter,” you told him, “I need you to listen to me. You’re the nicest guy I’ve ever met. Don’t let what happened with me keep you back, okay?” you cleared your throat, “It was selfish of me to drag you into that. None of it was your fault, and I betrayed your love and your trust. Don’t let me change you. Please, please don’t make me turn you into….me.”

He thought for a moment, then shot you a mischievous look, “You turned out just fine,” he said, then pulled you closer to hug you tight, and you patted his back before you pulled back.

“I’ll see you around Y/N.”

No you won’t.

“See you around, Charming.” You said softly, then got into your car and drove away.

                                               * * *

The road to airport was almost peaceful. You checked your wristwatch, then looked around and made your way to the café Billy had told you they were in.

“Hey babe,” Billy stood up to peck you on the lips and you winked at him, then sat down next to Karen who sat across Frank and Curtis drummed his fingernails on the table.

“Hey guys.”

“Today is just sad,” Karen mumbled, resting her chin on her fist and you grinned,

“Nah, it’s okay. You guys are among the very few people who will have my new number, it’s not like we will lose contact.”

“It’s beyond me how you’re willing to move away with this asshole.” Frank pointed at Billy, who punched at his arm,

“Don’t make her see sense until it’s too late, brother.”

“I know right? It surprised me too.” You grinned at Billy who shook his head slightly, “Anyways, you guys are totally invited.”

“I’ve never been to Tahiti,” Karen wondered out loud and Curtis nodded,

“Me neither.”

“See? One more reason to visit.”

“I mean I could use a vacation,” Frank stated and you motioned between them,

“There you go,” you said and turned to Curtis, “You too, you know? I can’t handle him alone, I need help.” 

“I know, I know...”

You checked your watch, “Bill.”

“Yeah, I know, it’s almost time.” He downed his coffee, then stood up, Frank and Curtis following him suit. You turned to Karen.

“Plane tickets on me.” You smiled before you pulled her into a hug, and she chuckled in your grip.

“Deal.”

“Don’t be a stranger, yeah?” Frank said as soon as you pulled back and cocked his head in Billy’s direction “Keep my boy out of danger, he’s an idiot.”

You let out a small laugh and nodded after hugging Curtis, “Don’t upset blondie over there and we have a deal. Oh, speaking of-“ you reached into your bag, “Karen?”

“Hm?”

“Catch.” You tossed her your car keys and she caught them mid-air, then shot you a quizzical look.

“What-?”

“I’ll mail you the papers when I land, consider it my thanks for putting up with my bullshit,” you clicked your tongue, “I may or may not have checked you out while Frank wasn’t looking too.”

“Hey!”

“She’s hot man, and I’m a sucker for pencil skirts!” You defended yourself and Karen gawked at you,

“Y/N, you can’t just give me your car-“

“Yeah I can, I’m rich.” You said, making Billy chuckle and shake his head fondly, “Take care, okay?”  

Billy threw a hand over your shoulder, then pulled you closer as you started walking to the private hangar. You entwined your fingers with his and he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“You okay?” he asked, “The funeral….?”

“Yeah,” you said as you heaved a sigh, “I just- um… I don’t feel guilty. Is that normal?”

“Our normal.” Billy said, “Others are expendable, remember?”

You nodded slowly as your phone buzzed in your hand, making you stop walking and you checked the screen.

Dad

You hesitated for a moment, then declined the call and put it back into your bag.

“Skittles?”

You let out a breath, then shook your head,

“Just-“ you swallowed thickly, looking around, “I never want to come back to….this. Any of this. Promise me I won’t have to.”

He seemed to understand what you meant, because he pulled you closer, his hands cradling your head before he kissed you.

“Never.” He whispered, “Let’s go home.”

                               *A MONTH LATER*

You were one hundred percent positive that you would never get tired of Tahiti. The scent of the ocean, the fresh air, the faint sound of waves hitting the shore as you dangled your legs over the wooden porch railing you were sitting on, eyes closed, with a warm cup of coffee in your hands.

This was what happiness felt like.

This was what home felt like.

It almost felt surreal.

Your eyes opened as a pair of arms wrapped around your waist and you smiled softly, looking up so that Billy could press a kiss on your forehead.

“Morning.”

“Hey,” his voice was raspy, still laced with sleep, “Why aren’t you in bed? It’s early.”

“I like watching the sunrise.” You said, “It’s… calm.”

“Well, I had a less calm activity in mind when I woke up.” He mumbled into your shoulder, making you giggle.

“Oh is that so?”  

“Mm hm,” he kissed your shoulder as you ran your fingers through his hair, which was longer than before. He let out a noise of content, making you smile.

“I still think I will wake up someday.” He mumbled and you frowned, then swung your legs over the railing and turned around so that you could face him.

“Hm?”

“This…everything.” Billy ran his fingertips down your bare arms, waking goosebumps. “All of this. It feels too good to be true.”

You shook your head, “Bill, it’s not a dream.” You said softly, “It’s our happy ending.”

“Guys like me don’t get happy endings, Skits.”

“Girls like me do.” You shrugged, “You got lucky Russo. Deal with it.”

He chuckled, “Sometimes before I fall asleep I think I will wake up next morning and…not find you there.”

“Hey,” you cupped his cheek so that his dark eyes would find yours, “Never going to happen. You’ve been stuck with me ever since I stole your candy, remember? Sorry to let you know, it’s the rest of your life.”

Billy nodded, as if trying to convince himself and keep the bad thoughts at bay, “It is, right?”

“I mean,” you trailed off playfully, “Not like I have a vintage marquise diamond rose gold band ring, which you could find downtown on the fifth street right across that restaurant we ate last night.”

That finally made him chuckle, “You would think you didn’t reject me when I asked you to marry me.”

“Um, you didn’t ask me to marry you dickhead, you said and I quote, You know I will marry you right? Which in all honesty is a terrible-“

“I also asked you on our first night here.”

“Okay, pillow talk proposals don’t count, everyone knows orgasms mess up with your mind- also to repeat, no ring Russo. Beyoncé taught me better.”

He nodded solemnly, “Third time is the charm.”

You couldn’t control your expression anymore so you burst into a laughter, shoving him slightly, “So, what did you have in mind again, when you woke up?”

He grinned at you, then lifted you up bridal style, making you let out a squeal and carried you back inside, both of you laughing like crazy.

                                          * * *

Time just flew by when you were happy.

It was so strange, normally –especially when you were in New York- every single thing you were going to do was planned, and each and every hour until you went to bed you had something. But now, it was as if you were free.

Now to think of it, you were.

“Okay, keep your eyes closed,” you said, still walking him until you reached the door of the empty shop. You had just finished dinner at a local restaurant, and you had basically dragged him outside afterwards, your heart beating in your ears. You unlocked the door, switched the lights on and turned to him, “Ta daa!”

Billy opened his eyes, then looked around before he turned to you with a quizzical look in his eyes.

“An empty shop?”

“My new gallery!” you couldn’t help to rock back and forth on the balls of your feet like an excited child, “I bought it!”

“Wait, really?” Billy raised his brows, “It’s uh… cozy.”

“I know, it’s smaller than the last one, but hear me out,” you licked your lips, “So I was walking downtown the other day, and it just occurred to me, what if I get this gallery to…to support the local artists? I made some research, and um- before, it was all about like general profit, and how much it’d push me up, and my bank account, that’s why I kept dealing with all those pretentious assholes, but now I don’t have to. I can actually use it to help people, and to support art, and- isn’t it amazing?” you finished, your voice going a pitch higher and that seemed to make Billy smile and nod.

“Wow, look at you babe.”

“I already talked to some street artists, and I think- Billy, it’s going to change their lives. I will be a part of that, I can make a difference here!”

Billy’s smile widened and he pulled you by the hand to get you closer before he tilted your chin up to kiss your lips.

“What do you think?” you asked, “Be honest. Brutally honest.”

“I think it’s a pretty good idea.”

“You’re not just saying that to get laid tonight?”

“You and I both know I’m getting laid tonight regardless.” He stated, making you giggle and steal a kiss, “But no, Skits it’s a really good idea.”

“And it won’t be as heavy as before, I can make my own rules here.”

“Mm hm. Once a boss, always a boss.”

“Yeah, keep that in mind buddy.” You grinned and let out a breath, “I’m excited!”

“I can see that,” Billy smacked your butt, making your jaw drop and shove him slightly,

“It’s a place of business, Russo!” You exclaimed as he chuckled and you pulled him by the hand outside, then locked the door.

You couldn’t stop talking about your new project all the way home. You had never even thought you could actually use your degree to help artists, it was all about money before, as your parents had drilled into your head, but now it was like a new horizon for you. You felt so energetic, so awake, and contrary to New York, you weren’t going to work to death.

It was just going to be perfect.

“So then I talked to him, and he says he had never even thought about being paid for his art which is insane, like I think he can get to places if he has a little push, and the gallery is close to the beach, so more tourists when you think about it.” You said as Billy pulled over in front of the house, then turned to you.

“You’re actually glowing, you know that?” he asked you with a fond smile, “Jesus, you’re even prettier when you’re happy.”

“I’m going to change lives!”

“Not a first for you Skits, you changed mine.”

You awwed, then leaned in to kiss him, “Come on, let’s get inside.”

“You go ahead babe, I’ll be there in five,” he pulled out his phone “I gotta call Frank, he said there was something he needed to talk to me.”

“Oh?”

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” he said and you nodded.

“Well, I’ll go inside and hop into the shower, and you’re welcome to join.”

Billy grinned, “I’ll be there in two minutes, I’m sure Frank can talk fast when he wants to.”

“That’s brotherhood for you,” you scoffed a laugh, then pecked him on the lips, “I love you. Don’t be late.”

You pushed open the car door, then went to unlock the front door and got inside. Humming a song, you made your way to the living room, switched the lights on and gasped, the fear hitting you with its full force.

Rawlins. Billy’s former boss, the man whom you heard was referred as dangerous and psycho by both Billy and Frank was standing right in front of your living room, pointing a gun at you.

“Hi.” He tilted his head, “Y/N, right? Russo’s girl?”

You could feel the whole room spinning, the panic making your mind work in full force. Your phone was in your bag, there was no way you could reach the door before a bullet hit you, and-

Billy was outside.

Oh God, he was outside.

“What do you want?”

He shot you a look, “You’re pretty,” he commented, “I can see why he wanted to settle down with you. But you see, framing me for a murder you committed made my life pretty difficult.”

“I-“

He tsk tsked, “And Russo…. Well. I’d say he’s had enough of this peace don’t you think? Working with Castle behind my back, and then pulling this shit? That’s not gonna fly. Maybe seeing your brains on the wall will make him remember that there are some lines he shouldn’t cross.”

Your heart was beating so fast that you thought it resonated through the room, as you heard footsteps and the front door opening,

“Skittles?” Billy called out and you opened your mouth to scream, to tell him to run away, to do anything- but before you could take a breath, Rawlins raised the gun and pulled the trigger.

There was a loud noise, louder than your heart.

Then, darkness.

                                    The End.

     Special thanks to: @theskytraveler @iblogabout-stuff @marauderskeeper  @asongofmarvelanddc @mellxander1993 @papercloudx @noisyinfluencerstrawberry @superwolfchild-fan  @anxietysucks @finnickfoxes @luminex3 @rhabakoli @fictionalthrill  @redrxbel  @maelloute @we-are-all-wild-things @evilturtlemonkey @xinyourdreamsx @demoncrypt1066 @go-crybaby @i-am-always-famished @delicatelilyflower  @mamaraptor  @rmwest9 @writeyourmindaway  @becs-bunker @bubbleself @flaboyance @binbonsadoration @propertyofpoeandbucky @alwaysadreamingoptimist  @lisa-stilinski @denimandcabernet @tofadavidson @seriouslynogood @mixed-imagination @broken-pieces @lettersofwrittencollective @binbons-is-theloml @thinemineours @cutie-bug  @random-quartz  @malik-payne @gollyderek @ariminiria @lucielandss @tofadavidson and lovely anons! <3 You’re awesome! 

[stella-monstrum]

Rob Zombie; "Why it's time to step outside the confinements of his own box."

For close to four decades,

 Rob Zombie has brought nonstop psychedelic grooves and a rockstar presence while gracing his own music and the silver screen with gut-churning, drug-tripping visuals. He not only commands quite the presence in films (whether his own successes or others’), but also makes appearances within many other horror soundtracks. There’s no denying that Zombie is a bloodied savant who has stayed incredibly consistent. 

[ᴿᵒᵇ ᶻᵒᵐᵇᶦᵉ. ⁽ˢᵒᵘʳᶜᵉ: ᴳᵒᵒᵍˡᵉ ᴵᵐᵃᵍᵉˢ⁾]

(Written by Stella, edited by Jacob J.)

(Side note; tumblr’s photo formatting is a pain)

Let’s take a dive into his music before getting into his film library. From 1985-1997, White Zombie released six albums (between studio and compilations). La Sexorcisto: Devil Music Volume One didn’t break into the Billboard 200 chart until a year after its 1992 release. Shortly thereafter, it became the hot and groovy bong success of the band, going on to sell two million copies. Astro Creep 2000, their final and fourth studio release, was their first and only album to chart within the Top 10 of the Billboard 200 in 1995. Up to this day in 2020, “White Zombie” has been featured in 47 TV, film, and video game soundtracks, from Beavis & Butthead to Pen15 to Bride Of Chucky (which includes a personal favorite moment of mine), amongst many others.

After the disbandment and separation, Zombie continued on his solo journey. He has gone on to release six studio albums, with a seventh on the way in March 2021, titled The Lunar Injection Kool Aid Eclipse Conspiracy. A multitude of hits—eight to be exact—sat within the Top 10 of the Billboard 200 records. 

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Zombie’s extensive film career is a “Super Beast” on its own. 

He has been very vocal about gaining inspiration from 1920s-1980s horror culture. In many interviews, he’s cited Stan Lee, Bella Lugosi, Alice Cooper, and Steven Speilberg as being responsible for molding the brain that we know today. 

Some of his influences include:

George A. Romero’s Dawn of the Dead (1978)

A Clockwork Orange (1971)

Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920) 

The Shining (1980)

Zombie’s upbringing in the carnival industry alongside his family is another key influence.

[[I’ll only be focusing on Zombie’s live-action films here.]]

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In 2000, Rob made his directorial and (very memorable) screen debut with House Of 1000 Corpses. 

It took three years to be released because of quarrels with major production companies regarding the film’s majorly aggressive themes of torture, blood, violence, sex—not to mention his arrogance with MGM, fighting to get rights back from Universal. Eventually, Lionsgate bit the bullet, albeit with the major stipulation of having Rob edit it down much further so House could pass with a “tame” R rating. 

[[House of 1000 Corpses: Rainn Wilson as taxidermy merman (Source: Tumblr—and if you’re brave, you can view the scene here.)]]

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In 2005 and 2019, the franchise’s next two installments—Devil’s Rejects and 3 From Hell—were released. The franchise is heavily influenced by the shocking, sickening, and unforgettable ’70s classic Texas Chainsaw Massacre. It follows a family of psychotic, sadistic, and bloodthirsty (if I’m being honest) necrophiliacs. They kidnap, kill, torture and brutalize anyone who gets in their way. At the end of Devil’s Rejects, they somehow manage to survive a police shootout, escape prison, and waltz on into Mexico (as seen in the franchise finale 3 from Hell).

Look, it’s all complicated.

Main Characters from the franchise:

Captain Spaulding—Sid Haig

Baby Firefly—Sheri Moon Zombie

Otis B. Driftwood—Bill Moseley 

Momma Firefly—Karen Black (recast as Leslie Easterbrook after Karen’s passing)

(Other notable appearances throughout: Chris Hardwick, Rainn Wilson, Danny Trejo, Dee Wallace, Ken Foree, and Diamond Dallas Page.)

⁽“ʰᵒᵘˢᵉˢ ᵗʳⁱˡᵒᵍʸ”, ᵈᵛᵈ ˢᵉᵗ﹔ ˢᵒᵘʳᶜᵉ﹔ ᵗᵃʳᵍᵉᵗ.ᶜᵒᵐ⁾

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The notorious/controversial Halloween (John Carpenter, 1978) remakes from 2007 and 2009.

(ᵃ ᵛⁱᵉʷ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᵇᵒˣ ᵃʳᵗ ᶠᵒʳ ᵗʰᵉ ʰᵃˡˡᵒʷᵉᵉⁿ ʳᵉᵐᵃᵏᵉˢ ⁽ˢᵒᵘʳᶜᵉ﹕ ᵃᵐᵃᶻᵒⁿ⁾)

Look, this is a remake that you either adore or hate with a burning passion. If you’re a horror fanatic, you know what’s up with the original.

I personally adore Zombie’s take. The fact alone that he gave us an entire background story as to why Michael became the psychotic slasher that we’ve come to know and love. Plus, with an increased suspense and gore factor? Worked incredibly well and did justice (in my opinion).

The film made me feel bad for Michael, with moments of child Myers in therapy, particularly his love for making masks to pass the time while he was locked up and the touching family moments between him and his mother Deborah (Sheri Moon).

ᵈᵉᵇᵒʳᵃʰ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵐⁱᶜʰᵃᵉˡ ᵐᵉʸᵉʳˢ ⁱⁿ ʲᵃⁱˡ ᵗʰᵉʳᵃᵖʸ. ⁽ˢᶜʳᵉᵉⁿᶜᵃᵖ, ʰᵃˡˡᵒʷᵉᵉⁿ. ˢᵒᵘʳᶜᵉ﹕ ᵍᵒᵒᵍˡᵉ⁾

[Michael’s cell in the 2007 Halloween remake. (Source: Google)]

Add in the supporting cast of Michael McDowell (Loomis), Brad Douriff (Sheriff Leigh), Scout Taylor-Compton (Laurie Strode), etc., and I honestly think that it came together very well as a remake.

The films rated relatively low, but they did gross higher than the budgets that they originally had to film on. Again, I’m not going to give much attention to the higher-ups of critical perception—it all comes down to personal taste.

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“Lords of Salem” (2013) 

[[Promotional art for Lords of Salem. (Souce: Google Images)]]

A film that’s centered within Salem, Massachusetts, 

this film—you guessed it—tackles witches, occultism, possession, Satan, and all the usual topics. Heidi (Sherri Moon) is a radio DJ who gets sent a mysterious record that’s labeled as being from “The Lords.” From then on out, shit gets a little dicey and admittedly, very disjointed. You can’t fault the cast here, and I loved the visuals that they were going for. However, with set schedule conflicts and multiple rewrites, which led to essentially running out of time to film? As a whole, what looked great on paper just couldn’t be done justice.

My FAVORITE sequence within the film (SPOILERS): 

I can forgive the disjointedness solely because of how mind-boggling and brilliant the film’s history and proper visuals were. Also, we got to see Dee Wallace, Judy Geeson, and Patricia Quinn as creepy and badass witches who moonlight as Heidi’s landlords. Also Meg Foster who leads their coven? Can we talk about what a femme-fueled power cast that is?!

[[Left to right: Patricia Quinn as Megan, Dee Wallace as Sonny, and Judy Geeson as Lacy Doyle. (Screencap, Lords of Salem. Source: Google) ]]

[[Meg Foster as coven leader Margaret Morgan. (Screencap, Lords of Salem. Source; google)]]

Like I said prior, the film gets a little wild. If you’re...well, buzzed prior to watching, it may make a little more sense. 

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“31” (2016)

[[Film poster for 31 (Source: Google)]]

[Synopsis from IMDB; “Five carnival workers are kidnapped and held hostage in an abandoned, hellish compound where they are forced to participate in a violent game, the goal of which is to survive twelve hours against a gang of sadistic clowns.”]

Here, we clearly see that Zombie is invoking his childhood growing up within carnivals. In a 2013 interview with LA Weekly, Zombie divulged more about it:

“When we were kids, my parents would [work at the carnivals], and me and my brother would get dragged along to these things all the time and have to work.”

He went further on to say;

 “Yeah, and it's not the nicest world. As a kid, you get exposed to the crazier underworld of the carnival. Me and my brother, when we were very little, we'd be inside the haunted house playing all day. So, already, what people are paying money to be scared [of], we're just playing in because it's fun. We saw the inner workings behind the machines.”

(”31″ trailer, source; Youtube)

Once again in this film, Zombie brings a powerhouse cast:

Jeff Daniel Phillips as Roscoe Pepper

Meg Foster as Venus Virgo

Malcom McDowell as Father Murder

Judy Geeson as Sister Dragon

Richard Brake as Doom Head

You can view the entire cast at IMDB here.

Set in 1976, Zombie stays true to his nods. Again, depending on taste, this is a huge hit or a wild miss with mindless homicidal violence, campiness, and climbs across the monkey bar of standards that we’re used to seeing from him.

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So at this point, you’re probably wondering why I think that it’s time for Rob Zombie to step out of the confinements of his own box...

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It’s no secret that Zombie sticks to only a small group of tropes: 

Slashers, families or groups of homicidals that lack remorse, the occult, etc. There’s no shame in sticking to what you know. Hell, Zombie has seemingly cracked the code over the past two decades that he’s been in the film industry that so many directors still don’t seem to get.

IMO, despite whatever you personally feel about the films mentioned above- I feel like we’re living a freaky groundhog day repeat within Zombie’s filmography. 

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Now, if it ain’t broke, why fix it? Look, I’m not saying that Zombie has to change anything. However, I would love to see him tackle some other nuances that we’ve already seen from him in small doses.

- Children: We haven’t seen Zombie exactly take on what horror films depict kids as. Sure, he made a breakout and impeccable choice with young Michael Myers (Daeg Faerch) back in 2007. I personally would adore to see a reimagined (NOT remade) Children of the Corn on acid, one we all know Zombie can tackle and turn every existing view on its head.

- Witchcraft, The Occult, Satan, Voodoo:  Zombie genuinely had a phenomenal concept (on paper) for 2012’s Lords of Salem. It was unfortunate that they ran out of resources and ran into unfortunate circumstances on set while filming. 

The film wasn’t a total tank, though, given how inspiring and insane all the visuals were throughout the 1 hr, 41min film. I am absolutely positive that, given a full-force opportunity, Rob could rectify the mess that was out of his control. We completely saw that he provided visuals that left quite the impression, and he could take those taboo subjects by the goat horns.

- Animals (not the human form): It’s no secret that Rob and his wife Sherri are ethical vegetarians. It would be so tongue and cheek to see them take on such topics as animals getting their revenge, or even vegetarians torturing carnivores. This twist on the formula would make for an interesting viewing.

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2.) In regard to time periods, 

Zombie stays within—and pays homage to—the 1970s and 1980s quite a bit. Obviously, those are the eras that Zombie personally loves the most when it comes to filmmaking. However, it would be very interesting to see him take on current day settings. 

Zombie has such a unique viewpoint. Given changing climates in politics, human decline/growth, the economy, etc., he would do work that could easily put Ryan Murphy to shame.

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3.) He could also do with some different casting every now and then.

Let me preface this by saying that I adore every repeat casting choice that Zombie has made for his films. 

Of course chemistry is a huge thing, and sticking to his friends is a very smart choice. However, he also has the potential to make new stars, boosting the power of those that may be under the radar. He can support those new stars with cameos from classic actors that we haven’t seen in awhile. I can’t begin to even fictionally cast those who fit the bill, but I do believe that with the “Zombie Touch,” he can bring so much more fresh air to the usual casting.

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There’s no doubting what Rob Zombie is clearly very good at. Despite mixed reviews from the horror world and critics, it’s time that his fans open their eyes to new possibilities. Of course, there are die-hards, but digging your feet in further doesn’t allow the growth of horror and its ever evolving themes.

[[ʳᵒᵇ ᶻᵒᵐᵇⁱᵉ, ˢᵒᵘʳᶜᵉ﹔ ᵍᵒᵒᵍˡᵉ ⁱᵐᵃᵍᵉˢ]]

This theory has been on my mind for a very long time—since 3 from Hell came out. I’m sure, in his usual fashion, we won’t be seeing any new films from Rob anytime soon (what with his new album set to release in March 2021, not to mention the toll that the pandemic has had on Hollywood.)

Still, it never hurts to challenge the set standards and ways.

[watchmegetobsessed]

Home - Shawn Mendes

okay I kid you not, this is the cutest shit i’ve ever written !!!!!! this idea popped into my mind while having  anap today lol and had to write it and it actually turned out to be such a cute little oneshot!!

masterlist

He loves quiet afternoons when time seems to stop and it’s just the two of them. With his hectic lifestyle it is basically impossible for them to feel normal and slow down, but she knows it. Y/N knew it even before they started dating that she would have to be his little island of peace in his busy everydays, and she is perfectly fine with it, while Shawn is thankful to have such an amazing and understanding human being in his life.

They are lying in the backyard of his parents’ home on the grass, Karen and Manny are inside, watching TV together while Aaliyah is in the kitchen with one of her friends baking some cookies. It’s a blissfully sunny day in Toronto, Y/N stole Shawn’s Youth hoodie while he has some old jumper on he found in his wardrobe. His hands are stretched out to the sides, her head resting on his bicep while reading a book. She is carefully flipping through the pages as he plays with the hem of the hoodie, his eyes closed, occasionally listening to his sister and her friend laugh at something back in the house, their voice traveling through the open window. He got back from his tour’s European leg just two days ago, he is getting used to the sudden calmness after his restless tour life, but it’s a change for the better. Though he loved every moment of being on the road, hitting another city every second day, there is nothing like home.

But what is home? He asked himself this question quite often while traveling through Europe. Y/N visited him only once during that time and it was obviously hard for both of them, but it just made the reunion even sweeter. They have been a couple for over two years, but it genuinely feels like they have known each other since forever. They didn’t play around for too long before officially getting together, it was probably only one week when they knew each other but wasn’t in a relationship. The kind of energy and affection they felt since day one was just too strong to ignore it and neither of them wanted to waste the time. He introduced her to his family after the first month and he still thinks that was the moment he knew she was the one. Y/N had the kind of charisma no one could resist, she found the common ground with his parents and his sister so fast, by the end of the day they were all in love with her just as much as he was.

He will never forget their first vacation together, they flew to Hawaii for her nineteenth birthday with both their families, had the time of their lives and it was also the place Shawn gave her a promise ring. Since then, he has been thinking about replacing that ring with another constantly, but in the past couple of months this thought outgrew him and has been bugging him a lot.

He opens his eyes and sees the book she is reading as she is holding it above them, her fingers gently playing with the corner of the page she is currently on. The ring is still there, the small diamond sparkles from time to time when the sunlight hits it. He reaches up and caresses her knuckles, then the ring itself.

“You awake?” she asks turning to face him with a smile. “I thought you already asleep.”

“Nah, just relaxing,” he smiles back, dropping his hand to her shoulder. “Imma get something to drink, do you want something?” he asks brushing her hair out of her forehead.

“Some water please.”

“Gotcha,” he says pressing a kiss to her forehead before sliding out from under her, forcing her to lie on the ground totally. He walks back to the house, the sweet scent of cookies hitting his nose immediately. On the couch his parents are watching some documentary, his dad half asleep while Karen is massaging his scalp with her eyes glued to the TV. Moving forward he sees that the kitchen is kind of a disaster, Aaliyah is trying to lick cookie dough off of a spoon, sitting on the countertop while her friend is telling her a story which she immediately stops upon seeing him, giving him some shy smiles.

“How are the cookies going?” he asks with a charming smile. He is well aware that Aaliyah’s friend has a crush on him, it has been kind of an open secret and even though his sister asked him to just ignore it and be nice, he likes to play innocent games with her, dropping cheeky comments here and there.

“They are phenomenal, just wait for them,” Aaliyah states proudly, holding the spoon out for him to get a taste of the dough. He accepts the offer, licking some off the top making the poor girl drooling over there watching him.

“Mm, save some for me when it’s done,” he nods in approval and then turns to his little admirer. “Have you tasted it? Want some?” he asks holding out the spoon he just took to his mouth a few moments ago, making her go as red as a tomato.

“Shawn!” His sister warns him, but there is a smile hiding on her lips as well.

“Okay, I’m out of here,” he chuckles grabbing two bottled waters from the fridge and heading back out.

When he gets back Y/N has put the book down and is checking her phone. At his appearance she locks it putting it aside as Shawn hands her the water.

“Thanks babe,” she smiles at him as he sits back down, both of them taking a few sips from their drinks. “What did you do inside? I heard Aaliyah call your name in that tone she only uses when she tells you off.”

“Just messed a bit with her friend,” he chuckles shrugging his shoulders.

“Shawn! Leave the poor girl alone! She is head over heels in love with you, it’s not nice to tease her.”

“I’m not teasing her, I’m just…” He tries to think of something to say, but he knows she is right.

“You’re just teasing her, period. I think it’s cute that she has a crush on you.” She puts the bottle aside leaning back on her hands, her legs tangled with his.

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, I mean, I don’t blame her, you are kind of hard not to crush on,” she grins at him, making him chuckle as well.

“Speaking from experience?”

“Pretty much,” she nods grinning before leaning closer and pecking his lips shortly. “My big fat crush hasn’t gone away since day one,” she tells him while running her fingers through his locks. His hair is getting too long, but she doesn’t mind it, being able to take a handful of it is actually one of her favorite things.

“So you’re still just crushing on me? Even after two years?” Shawn asks with a fake gasp.

“I mean, yeah. Not like we are anything serious, duh!” she rolls her eyes getting in on the joke.

“Oh you’re right. We’ve been just messing around, no strings attached.”

“Exactly! Just imagine us together, like officially!” she continues the act, making it harder for both of them to keep a straight face. “It wouldn’t work for sure.”

“Oh yeah. Totally. You’re not even my type, really,” he says, but he can’t hold his grin back anymore, his hand finds hers and laces their fingers together.

“Glad to hear that, I thought you were taking it all too serious.” This is the last line she manages to get out before bursting out in laughter.

His hand slide to the back of her neck bringing her closer for a kiss that soon turns out into something deeper and longer than just one kiss. They don’t take it too far though, they have never been fans of being too touchy with people around, and right now there are two teenage girls not too far away.

Leaning back she cups his face in her hands, a wide smile on his lips as he stares back at her. His arms are around her waist, keeping her close to him while she is hugging his waist with her legs. She pecks his chin before reaching for her book and opening it she rests it on his chest and starts reading again.

She is home.

The thought pops into his head abruptly and it kind of lightens everything up. His whole life he has thought about home as a place, a house, a room, a neighborhood, but he has been questioning it lately, because it all changed since he met her. Home is where she is, anywhere around the world, in her arms, in her eyes, in her smile.

The realization hits him hard in the chest, making his heart pound in his chest so fast that even her notices it. She looks up at him with furrowed eyebrows as she moves the book and places a hand on his chest.

“Is everything alright?” she asks, worry lacing through her voice.

“I love you,” he tells her as an answer, just confusing her even more.

“I love you too, but are you okay? You heart is-“

“Marry me,” he then blurts out before he could even think about it, completely taking her by surprise.

“What?” she whispers dropping the book to the side, her eyes glued to his face.

“I… I’ve been thinking about you a lot. You and us in general and I don’t think it can get any better, you are the one. So… I want to change this ring to another one,” he tells bringing her hand up between them, running his fingers through the ring. She dizzily follows his gaze to the jewelry as Shawn is waiting for her to say something in response. But she keeps silence and it starts to worry him.

“It was too sudden, right? I’m sorry, I should have-“ he starts explaining, but he doesn’t get to finish.

“Where’s the ring?” she asks looking back at him, now surprising him.

“What?”

“You just asked me to marry you. Where is the ring?” she asks again, a small smile starting to show on her lips. “I mean, it’s not really a proposal if there is no ring.”

“You want a ring?” he asks grinning at her.

“I need to change it, right? I need a ring then.” She holds her hand up wiggling her ring finger in front of him, enjoying the teasing, because she genuinely thinks this was a rushed decision and he does not have the ring yet. But she is wrong.

Shawn grins at her letting go of her and he runs back into the house, leaving her completely speechless. He runs up to his room, digs up his suitcase until he finds the small velvety box he has been carrying around with him since he was in Stockholm, where he bought it on a free afternoon when he and his friends went out to wander around the city. When he saw it in a shop’s window he immediately knew it was the perfect one.

With the box in his hand he runs back out, Y/N is now standing at the same spot he left her and when he gets down on one knee she gasps. He pops the lid open and the diamond ring is right there, in front of her eyes.

“So, you wanted a ring and I happened to have it. I’ve had it for almost two months now, didn’t know when and how it would happen, but I guess this is the time. Will you marry me?” he asks again, waiting for her official answer.

“Say yes!” they hear Aaliyah shout and they both turn back towards the house, where both his parents and his sister are standing, watching them with the biggest smile on their face. Even Aaliyah’s friend is cheering for them in the back.

“So what do you say?” he asks, his hands shaking to finally hear her answer.

“Yes. Yes I will marry you,” she manages to say as the tears roll down her face.

Shawn jumps to his feet wrapping his arms around her and spinning her around. His family starts clapping in the back and she lets out a laughter before he sets her down to the ground again. She takes off the promise ring and he replaces it with the other one, then she cups his face in her hands pulling down for a kiss.

“You cheeky bastard, I really thought there is no ring,” she mumbles into his lips, making him chuckle.

“But you still said yes.”

“I did,” she smiles caressing his rosy cheeks. “What else would have I said? I told you my big fat crush hasn’t gone away since day one.”

“Lucky me,” he grins down at her before kissing her again.

[karenpage]

soft kastle prompt! Frank's comes back from yeehaw states after dd3 and is with Karen and he knows about everything that happened and they're just in bed and he cant stop looking st her and touching her maybe they cuddle up and eat take out or watch TV or something but Frank is just his puppy self in love with her

When he left New York, everything was quiet. Calm. Or, as close as a city that never sleeps can be to dreaming - he wondered if shit, maybe he had gone and died that day at the carousel because he had never caught an inch of peace while living.

But he is. He’s breathing and right now it tastes like Joshua trees, juniper thick and prickly on the shoreline and the kick of salt, sand, the sea. Frank’s never had the chance to appreciate this country, and for all its faults…

It sure as hell’s a beautiful place.

Watching the fat, yellow sunset on the far side of the grand canyon, or rise in the shadow of Mount Rainier, in the thicket of a forest or in the heart of a desert valley. Frank saw it all and let it stick to his ribs, let it sink past the kevlar and tucked it someplace safe. He’s not nor has he ever been a sentimentalist but maybe the new Frank gets to be. Gets to appreciate the little things, the sing of cicadas or a nice lady buying him coffee in Tucson when he complimented the apron that matched her eyes.

Maybe isn’t much to go off of but it’s more than the finality of death so he’d take that, and whatever grain of good will he finds along his way.

He really shouldn’t be all that surprised that, while he was gone, everything in Hell’s Kitchen had gone the way of its namesake. Worse, is that a certain Miss Page sat at the epicenter of the wreckage and all he had left of that calm is lost in the twitch of fingertips, resting against the trigger’s curve.

She has got to stop making a habit of pissin’ off the worst sorts of people, even if it’s evidently in her job description as an investigative journalist, to do just that.

Frank will worry about that some other time.

She’s safe right now, tucked into his side and snoring. Karen had warned him, sleep heavy and slurring her speech, says that Ellison woke her up, asleep at her desk and asked her to keep it to a dull roar.

Her nose twitches, eyes moving rapidly beneath their lids. She’s dreaming, and Frank finds himself wondering, not for the first time, what she dreams about. Is it his place to ask? Does he exist in her in-between? Does he have that right?

Frank doesn’t entertain the notion that he’s good enough for her, but he’s also not as hellbent on self-sacrifice these days so he’ll unpack that when she isn’t a warm weight in his arms and she isn’t smiling in her sleep.

She shifts, huffs out a sigh and the furrow between her brow deepens, she doesn’t have the right to be this cute, not when he’d seen her fire and fury. Nearly died three times just to make sure she saw another day of living. But here they are and she’s riled up, even in her dreams, so Frank chuckles, tucks some feathery strands of her hair behind her ear and murmurs, “can’t catch a break, can ya?”

When she wakes up, he’d carefully disentangled himself, left her bundled up in her favorite blankets on the couch while he sat at the kitchen table, ordering Thai food in a hushed, gruff voice. Trying to keep quiet so he wouldn’t disturb her. It isn’t that, which pulls her out of her deep, and evidently busy sleep. It’s the space he left, it’s the phantom of his arm around her waist and the spot beside the hollow of her throat that burns where he’d placed a kiss moment before.

“Hey,” she rubs the sleep from her eyes, sitting up to rest her chin on the back of the couch, watching him. “Food?” With a yawn full of hope. Single syllables and short sentences are the groggy intellecutal’s best friend.

Frank doesn’t mind, brevity is sort of his shtick. So he just smiles at her over the laminated edge of the takeout menu and says, “yes ma’am.”

Romance isn’t grand gestures, isn’t hundred thousand dollar diamonds too heavy to lift the hand its on. It’s not even fresh flowers in a vase every day. It’s the roses on the window sill that’d grown too large for the ceramic pot, so they’d been transplanted into something larger. Left to grow. To thrive. It’s the singing hush of rain against the window and the way the neon light outside makes Frank’s eyes look like liquid gold, and how her stomach fills with butterflies when she can’t look away.

“Perfect.” She smiles lazily, stretches her arms above her head and when she squints up at him he’s stepped over to her, his thumb sweeping back and forth across her chin.

He doesn’t say anything, Frank’s always been a man of action, words are more the wheelhouse of the journalist he loved, pressed a kiss to her forehead and rested his own against it. Their touchstone of peace, comfort, of quiet worship.

Coming back had meant the city, but returning to Karen is where he found himself home.

[bottled-bliss]

The Pulsing World Above

It starts with the humming of a tune.

Frank sits up in bed, covered in cold sweat. He looks around the shadows in his room, but doesn’t find anything unfamiliar, realizing he’s short of breath, like he’s been running. The tune stops.

“Karen?” A whimper. He didn’t mean to sound like that.

“Hey, hey,” she comes running. “What’s wrong?”

Tiny drops of water glisten on her skin, sliding slowly down her body. Her hand wipes the sweat off his face. Water is dripping all over the bed. He wets his lips on her palm, kisses it.

“Don’t go, Karen.”

“I have to. I’m already on thin ice with Mitchell, skipping work will only make things worse.”

“Please.”

She bends forward and kisses his forehead. He feels her smile. “I’ll be back before you’ve had the chance to miss me.”

Frank wakes up with a start. If he concentrates hard enough, maybe the dream won’t fade so fast this time. He can still feel her touch on him. It only lasts for a few seconds. He gives his face a hard rub and gets out of bed quickly. For a moment, he imagined the sheets were wet.

He goes to work, like a good boy. Construction. It’s always construction because the sites are loud and distracting. And it’s been a while since he could count only on tearing things down to distract him. Even that doesn’t help anymore. But it’s okay; he does his best work at night anyway.

David calls him at some point. “There’s been a new development.”

“Can’t talk now. Send me the details.”

He could talk. He just didn’t want to.

She’s humming in the shower. The tune stops.

“Karen?” A whimper. Again. He must learn to control his voice.

“Hey, hey. What’s wrong?”

She glistens like a diamond. Frank wants to stop her from leaving. He’s tried before. It never works.    

“Don’t go, Karen.”

“I have to. I’m already on thin ice with Mitchell, skipping work will only make things worse.”

“Please.”

The sheets are getting wet. He can almost feel the fabric swirling around his legs, pulling him down.

She bends forward and kisses his forehead. He can’t see her smile, but he feels it, knows it’s bright enough to incinerate the world. “I’ll be back before you’ve had the chance to miss me.”

Stay. Stay.

Frank jolts up. There are tears in his eyes. He doesn’t have time for this, he has to go to work. Just like every other day. Rinse. Repeat. He should take a shower, but can’t bear the thought of feeling the water on his skin.

David calls again. “You never got back to me.”

“Been busy. I told you, I’ll take care of it.”

“I know you will, Frank. That’s not what worries me.”

He can’t stand the sound of David’s voice, so full of concern.

“Don’t worry about me, buddy,” he chokes out. “There’s nothing to worry about.”

He hangs up without giving David a chance to respond.

Fisk is getting cocky again. He’s being very careful, not wanting to draw Daredevil’s attention and he succeeds in that department at least. Frank’s attention is always on him however. He doesn’t know it yet, but he will find out soon enough. He will find out, on a sunny day, when the inmates will be allowed outside. Frank wants it to be a sunny day, bright and beautiful. It will make killing Fisk even more satisfying. He’s been biding his time.

The sound of water. The humming. She hasn’t left yet. But she will.

“Karen!” He’s crying.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”

God, her eyes. She loves him. She loves him here. He should be able to make her stay.

“Don’t go, Karen. Please. Please, don’t go.”

Her gentle hand is on his face. “I have to.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ll get in trouble otherwise. I’m already on thin ice with Mitchell, skipping work will only make things worse.”

“Please, I’ll do anything.”

Her laugh is soft. It shatters his heart. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be back before you’ve had the chance to miss me.”

The sheets have turned into sopping serpents. If he looks down, he’ll see the watery abyss calling out to him. He would let it take him, if he had the guts.

He wakes up abruptly. He would cry, but when he looks out the window, he sees the sun is out. Frank can already tell it’s burning hot. Bright and beautiful. It’s time.

He could have set up even further, but he wants to see Fisk’s face as clearly as possible. He would have done it differently, eye to eye, if he had a way into the prison. The sniper scope is the next best thing. It means the world to him that David agreed to help with this. He must remember to thank him.

With the phone between his ear and his shoulder, he watches Fisk come out to the yard. He’s not surprised to see one of his lackeys bringing a small cell phone to him, handing it over with respect, like Fisk is someone that’s supposed to be revered. He isn’t. Frank knows that very well.  

“Hello, Wilson.”

“Frank Castle?”

“That’s right. I’m glad you recognize my voice.”

His finger is twitching close to the trigger. It would be easy to finish this now. But he has to make it last.

“To what do I owe this… pleasure, Mister Castle?”

“Did you look at the pictures?”

“What pictures?”

“After-” Frank grits his teeth. He can’t give this bastard the pleasure of hearing him unravel. Even if it’s the last thing he’ll ever hear. “After they pulled her out of the river. Did you want to see what she looked like? Admire the results of your work?”

He remembers forcing David to show him those pictures. It wouldn’t be real until he saw them. Maybe he should have left well enough alone, because he can’t get that image out of his mind. He owed her that much though. He had to see. He had to. It was his fault to begin with.

“Are you referring to Karen Page?”

The nerve. The nerve of him.

“You know damn well I’m referring to Karen Page, you son of a bitch.”

“Yes, I looked at the pictures. They brought me some sort of closure.”

Frank feels venom gathering in his mouth.

“I thought so.”

“Was she important to you, Castle?”

If it was any other person asking him that question, Frank would easily say yes. Christ, yes, she was important. She was what made the world go round. But because it’s Fisk, he can only snarl back. “I don’t know. Is Vanessa important to you?”

Fisk’s face falls. Frank isn’t going to touch Vanessa, he’s not that kind of monster. It was worth threatening him with it though, just to see that priceless expression.

“Nobody touches Vanessa!” Fisk screams into his phone.

“Yeah, that’s what I said about Karen,” Frank tells him and pulls the trigger.

The bullet finds the center of Fisk’s forehead and lodges itself in his head without much effort. When he drops to the floor, Frank feels pleased with himself. Not for long; the warm sensation won’t last the night, but it will do for now. Until she comes back. She might even stay this time. She never stays. But she might.

Water. The exquisite melody of her soft hum.

“Karen.” His voice shouldn’t be coming out in a whimper anymore. But it does. That will never change.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

She rushes to him, streams of water running down her face, her shoulders, her arms. The bed is soaked. (Frank knows he’s crying in his sleep.)

“Don’t go, Karen.”

“I can’t stay.”

He knows she would, if she could. Her fingers caress his face. There’s no anger about her, no condemnation in her tone. She loves him.

“Please.”

She leans forward and kisses his forehead. He feels her smile on his skin and his heart breaks into a million little fragments. She loved him.

“I can’t.”

Frank wakes up with a start.

AO3

[piratefalls]

previous lists here and here and here

let’s be real i’m just devouring shit in this fandom at this point why are yall so good 

Surfacing by spellitwithyourpeas

Blood soaked and savage, he hadn’t even registered the piece of metal debris sticking out of his arm. He wasn’t going to stop, and she didn’t want him to, she just needed him to slow down.

To breathe.

i vow to protect what’s mine by grootmorning

Frank returned from an extended vacation with Curtis to find seventy six messages and a hundred and forty eight missed calls from David - Fisk had been released.

There was only one thought in his mind: get to Karen.

What we find in the shadows by PunkyNemo

He doesn't know what he did to deserve her; what she sees in him that makes her love him almost as fiercely as he does her. There are times that it doesn't feel real and then there are other times when it feels like it's the only true thing in the world, and the thought of losing her is too much for him to bear.

But she said she'd stay. She said she'd stay forever. And that has to be enough.

It has to.

Kick by damalur

They'd been sleeping together for one year, two years, never talking about it.

Never Lucky by prozacplease

Periods are never convenient, but this is the worst one Karen has ever had.

Been A Long Time Coming by shipping_slut

All it takes is one ridiculous, drunk confession to set things in motion.

tipping my tongue to tell you that it’s love by 152glasslippers

“How did you two even meet?”

Karen smirked and dropped her eyes to the countertop. “He never told you?”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but Frank doesn’t talk much. Especially about certain things.”

Karen let out a breathy laugh. “And I’m one of those things?”

Evidence by onebatch2batch

It doesn’t escape Karen’s notice that she’s had more superhuman vigilantes in her apartment in the last few weeks than she has regular people.

Or: Matt returns from the dead, Karen is dating a vigilante, and everyone knows.

the root of the root and the bud of the bud by nagia

There's a new drug in town, a warehouse full of dead shitbags (and newly empty of a strange, tropical-looking flower), and Karen Page has the kind of connections that might help him figure out what this shit is.

Retrograde by glycerineclown

Basically, the Punisher goes off to kill Neo-Nazis and comes back with amnesia. But it's more complicated than that.

bloodsport by PurpleLex

[two-part tumblr prompt: "A baddie is threatening/hurting Karen in front of a tied up Frank. And he's raging?"]

falling (into you) by lilabut

She didn't expect to ever see him again when he stepped away from her and climbed out of that elevator earlier. Most of her had accepted that it would be the last she ever saw of Frank Castle. The tears in his eyes and the blood on his face as he pressed his forehead to her own and fell.

But now he is right here, hiding in the dark of her home.

Excuses by an_ardent_rain

Frank's ego is not the only thing swelling.

like diamonds in the sky by watermelonp00fs

Hold on with two hands and never let go.

Maybe I’m Waking Up Today by onebatch2batch

Karen starts dating, and Frank has a hard time coping. Post-TPS.

Unequivocal by LaMorenaReina

Frank has something to tell Karen. She handles it pretty well.

Half a Sin by therestlessbrook

She takes a few steps closer to the cell bars. Her hands are unbound, but she can imagine how she looks: she hasn’t showered in five days, has been peeing in a bucket, and any sleep has consisted of stolen moments. Frank’s index finger twitches spasmodically, and she glances at it, rather than his face.

“I see you found a new career,” she murmurs.

A hoarse scoff. It sounds almost like a laugh. “Yeah. Keeping your ass out of the fire might prove to be a full-time job.”

Or, Karen investigates an illegal fighting ring and is kidnapped for her troubles. Frank enters the tournament to get her out.

something that’ll haunt me when you’re not around by HeartonFire

Karen and Frank reflect on their feelings after leaving the hospital and figure out where to go from here.

[tarnishedhalo]

⌚ - Karen

Picture Perfect || Accepting

"Think they're real?" Riley can be unusually silent when he wants to be despite his heavy tread and his boots. He's here pulling extra shifts because the department wanted someone like him, considering the royal collection was on loan to the museum and he'd come in before the public to do his rounds. What he hadn't expected was to see Karen Page covering the beat. Taking pictures, dictating notes. Doesn't seem like her thing at all. So he finds himself walking up behind her ~not creeping, definitely not creeping~ and stopping to say hello.

Of course he asks her if she thinks they're real. The entire collection is far too much gold and gemstones, too tempting a target that he has to wonder how much of it would find a better home with the other paste gems in Madame Tussaud's.

"Better question, would there be any amount of money in the world that would make you dress up wearing nothing but the coronation robe, a tiara, and maybe a handful of those necklaces in the other hall?" He shifts from behind to beside her and flashes her a side smile to show that he's kidding. Probably. He's missed seeing her around, missed taking a shot at faux-flirting with her.

[billdecker]

2018.

 Here we are with the films list again. Bold = watched first time. 

Films.

The English Patient

The BFG

Anna Karenina [1967]

King Kong [2005]

54

Henry VIII and his Six Wives [1972]

The Disaster Artist

Napoleon Dynamite

The Addams Family

Kong: Skull Island

Justice League

The Addams Family Values

Johnny English

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle

Wayne’s World

Lady Bird

Westworld

Carol

Green Lantern 

England is Mine

Rush Hour

Pride and Prejudice [2005]

Call Me By Your Name

The Greatest Showman

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Dante’s Peak

Only Lovers Left Alive

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Blade Runner

Moonrise Kingdom

Clue

Get Smart

Darkest Hour

Blade Runner 2049

Lost in Translation

The Talented Mr. Ripley

The Lego Movie

Anchorman

The Shape of Water

Get Out

San Andreas

The Beguiled

Lady Chatterley’s Lover [1981]

Interview With a Vampire

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Song to Song

Atonement

La La Land

Drop Dead Fred

Attack the Block

Another Mother’s Son

I, Tonya

The Sense of an Ending

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Cold Mountain

Step Up

The Founder

The Fugitive

The Promise

Papadopoulos and Sons

Rob Roy

The Florida Project

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women

Head in the Clouds

Crooked House

Miami Vice [2006]

Miss Sloane

Molly’s Game

Battle of the Sexes

Half of a Yellow Sun

A Quiet Passion

Lady Jane

Anne of a Thousand Days

Mars Attacks!

Zoolander

A Midsummer Night’s Dream

Nina

Pele: Birth of a Legend

2001: A Space Odyssey

A Futile and Stupid Gesture 

The Mask

Phantom Thread

Black Panther

Eyes Wide Shut

The Death of Stalin

Baywatch

Paddington 2

Wonder Woman

Star Trek [2009]

Star Trek Into Darkness

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

Star Trek Beyond

Denial

Chariots of Fire

Captain America: The First Avenger

Iron Man

The Incredible Hulk

Borg vs McEnroe

Iron Man 2

Thor

Avengers Assemble

Iron Man 3

Thor: The Dark World

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Guardians of the Galaxy

Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 2

Ant-Man

Captain America: Civil War 

Doctor Strange

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Thor: Ragnarok

War Horse

God’s Own Country

In Bruges

The Big Sick

The Towering Inferno

Magnolia

Our Souls at Night 

Dog Day Afternoon

Willow

Roman Holiday

Sabrina

Annihilation 

North by Northwest

The Emoji Movie

Coco

Grease

Dirty Dancing

Captain Fantastic

The Wicker Man

This is Spinal Tap

Magic Mike XXL

Come Sunday

The Dark Tower

Bill

Avengers: Infinity War

Loving Vincent

Mansfield Park

Three Men and a Little Lady

Oliver!

Rough Night

Avatar

One Last Dance

Girls Trip

Alex and the List

The Dambusters

The Mummy [2017]

London

The Damned United

The Wedding Video

Deadpool

Enter the Dragon

Atomic Blonde

The Red Shoes

The Great Gatsby [2013]

Bram Stoker’s Dracula

South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut

Morris: A Life With Bells On

Boss Baby

Solo: A Star Wars Story

Kenny

All About Eve

Lethal Weapon

Lethal Weapon 2

Final Portrait

The Little Mermaid

The Huntsman: Winter’s War

Men in Black 3

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider

Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life

Tomb Raider [2018]

Crocodile Dundee

Jabberwocky

Legend

Lethal Weapon 3

The Witches

Down With Love

Clash of the Titans [1981]

Clash of the Titans [2010]

I Give it a Year

Terminal

Where the Wild Things Are

The Handmaiden

The Muppet Movie [1979]

Brakes

Ready Player One

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

A Wrinkle in Time

Breathe

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

Eagle vs Shark

Farenheit 451 [2018]

Picnic at Hanging Rock

Mission Impossible

Mission Impossible II

Mission Impossible III

The Saint [2017]

JFK

Ocean’s 8

Deadpool 2

Falling Down

Duck Butter

Peter Rabbit

44 Inch Chest

You Instead

The Deep Blue Sea

Not Another Happy Ending

Punch Drunk Love

The Fast and The Furious

2 Fast 2 Furious

The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift

Fast & Furious

Fast Five

Fast & Furious 6

Furious 7

The Fate of the Furious

Geostorm

Ant-Man and the Wasp

Escape to Victory

Porcupine Lake

The Snowman

The Incredibles

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again

Daphne

Ingrid Goes West

One Day

My Neighbor Totoro

There Will Be Blood

Rampage

Goodbye Christopher Robin

Incredibles 2

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before

Belle de Jour

Mission Impossible - Fallout

The Spy Who Dumped Me 

The Meg

Little Ashes

Meet Joe Black

The King of Comedy

Jason and the Argonauts

Flash Gordon

Odette

Strictly Ballroom

Into the Woods

Cars 3

The Book of Life

Murder on the Orient Express [2017]

Kath & Kimderella

Madame Bovary

X-Men: First Class

X-Men: Days of Future Past

X-Men: Apocalypse

All the Money in the World

Quincy

The Post

Becoming Bond

Early Man

Little Women [1994]

Dangerous Liaisons

The Party

Operation Finale 

Nappily Ever After

What’s New Pussycat?

Saved!

A Star is Born [1976]

Modern Life is Rubbish

Jaws

The Mercy

Swept from the Sea

Permission

Venom

A Star is Born [2018]

Far and Away

Heat

Jane Eyre

Braveheart

Film Stars Don’t Die in Liverpool

Juliet, Naked

First Man

Christopher Robin

Vincent and Theo

Pollock

Bohemian Rhapsody

One More Time With Feeling

Interlude in Prague

The Mask of Zorro

The Legend of Zorro 

You, Me, and Him

The Nutcracker and the Four Realms 

Crazy Rich Asians

Bobby [2016]

Outlaw King

Space Jam

They Shall Not Grow Old

The Grinch [2018]

The Big Lebowski 

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

Mulan

The Battle of the River Plate

They’ll Love Me When I’m Dead

My Generation

Batman Begins

Being John Malkovich

Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone

Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets

Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban

Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire

Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix

Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows - Part One

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows - Part Two

Widows

Immortal Beloved

Basquiat 

Goya’s Ghosts

The Madness of King George

Charade

Star Wars: A New Hope

Stars Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi

Star Wars: The Phantom Menace

Stars Wars: Attack of the Clones

Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Star Wars: Rogue One

The Polar Express

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Dr. No

From Russia With Love 

Goldfinger

Thunderball

You Only Live Twice

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

Diamonds Are Forever

Live and Let Die

The Man With the Golden Gun

The Spy Who Loved Me

Moonraker

For Your Eyes Only

Octopussy

A View to a Kill

The Living Daylights

Licence to Kill

Goldeneye

Tomorrow Never Dies

The World is Not Enough 

Die Another Day 

Casino Royale

Quantum of Solace

Skyfall

Spectre

Superbob

Greenfingers

Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle

A Christmas Prince

Aquaman

Love, Cecil

A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding

The Man Who Invented Christmas

Copying Beethoven

The Party’s Just Beginning 

Point Break

Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa

The Sound of Music

The Muppet Christmas Carol

The Muppets

Cars 2

The Holiday

A Bad Moms Christmas

The Holiday Calendar

The Christmas Chronicles

Nativity

Nativity 2: Danger in the Manger

Arthur Christmas

Bobby Robson: More Than a Manager

Zootropolis

Mary Poppins

The Good Dinosaur

Trolls

Rise of the Guardians

Bros: After the Screaming Stops

The Beatles: Eight Days a Week - The Touring Years

Get Carter [1971]

Bottle Rocket

Turbo

Closer

Nothing Like a Dame

Bolt

Make Us Dream

Die Hard

How to Train Your Dragon 2

Porridge

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

Books.

A Book For Her - Bridget Christie

Hickory Dickory Dock - Agatha Christie

Bright Star - John Keats

The Oberon Book of Comic Monologues for Women - Katy Wix

The Oberon Book of Comic Monologues for Women: Volume 2 - Katy Wix

Slaughterhouse 5 - Kurt Vonnegut

Division Street - Helen Mort

The Victorian Guide to Sex - Fern Riddell

A Woman’s Work - Harriet Harman

Help - Simon Amstell

The Princess Diarist - Carrie Fisher

Selected Poems - Sylvia Plath

Ariel - Sylvia Plath

The ‘If You Prefer a Milder Comedian Please Ask For One’ EP - Stewart Lee

The Rachel Papers - Martin Amis

Parker Pyne Investigates - Agatha Christie

Bone - Yrsa Daley-Ward

Pages For You - Sylvia Brownrigg

The Sun and Her Flowers - Rupi Kaur

Different for Girls: A Girl’s Own True-Life Adventures in Pop - Louise Wener

A Single Man - Christopher Isherwood

A Room of One’s Own - Virginia Woolf

Repeal the 8th - Una Mullally

Why Not Socialism? - G.A. Cohen

The Chaos of Longing - K.Y. Robinson

High-Rise - J.G. Ballard

Animal Farm - George Orwell

Fully Coherent Plan - David Shrigley

The Lesser Bohemians - Eimear McBride

The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole aged 13 3/4 - Sue Townsend

Hera Lindsay Bird - Hera Lindsay Bird

Submarine - Joe Dunthorne

In the Penal Colony - Franz Kafka

Babette’s Feast - Isak Dinesen (Karen Blixen) 

The Expelled - Samuel Beckett

Youth - Joseph Conrad

The Life of Rylan - Rylan Clark-Neal

Autumn - Ali Smith

The Cornet-Player Who Betrayed Ireland - Frank O’Connor

Two Gallants - James Joyce

Teaching my Mother How to Give Birth - Warsan Shire

Selected Poems - Edgar Allan Poe

Casino Royale - Ian Fleming

Frankenstein - Mary Shelley

The Door in the Wall - H.G Wells

Terra Incognita - Vladimir Nabokov

Dirty Pretty Things - Michael Faudet

Women  & Power: A Manifesto - Mary Beard

Dear Illusion - Kingsley Amis

Bitter Sweet Love - Michael Faudet

Smoke & Mirrors - Michael Faudet

Girl Meets Boy - Ali Smith

Pre-Raphaelites - Heather Birchall

Conspiracy - Charlotte Greig

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams

Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray

Sex and Rage - Eve Babitz

Scoop - Evelyn Waugh

The Letters of Vincent Van Gogh - edited by Mark Roskill

Role Models - John Waters

The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald

How Not To Be a Boy - Robert Webb

Animal - Sara Pascoe

Absolute Pandemonium - Brian Blessed

Eileen - Ottessa Moshfegh

A Discovery of Witches - Deborah Harkness

A Handful of Dust - Evelyn Waugh

Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters - Jane Austen and Ben H. Winters

Normal People - Sally Rooney

Feminists Don’t Wear Pink - Scarlet Curtis and Others. 

Parsnips, Buttered - Joe Lycett

The Humans - Matt Haig

The Machine Stops - E.M. Forster

Ivanhoe - Sir Walter Scott

Poems for a World Gone to Shit - Various

[janedemonium]

here I am bitch

fair

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

I don;t actually remeber, either my mom or my friend Mandy

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoing i guess

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

a lot of people, but i guess largely my friend Evan

4. Are you easy to get along with?

more or less, i like arguing a lot but usually in a fun way

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

I’m in between people I like

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

People who are nice and fun to talk to

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

unlikely but still possible

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

my mom

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

yes if it involves me, otherwise no

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

my roommate

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

I’m starting to actually enjoy beer, help

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

You Only Live Once, The Strokes

No Scrubs, TLC

Rich, Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Intergalactic, the Beastie Boys

Blue, Marina and the Diamonds

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

YES

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yes for luck in the sense that I make my own, no for miracles

15. What good thing happened this summer?

I got paid

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

I doubt it

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

yes18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

no19. Do you like bubble baths?

yes but I haven’t taken one in years20. Do you like your neighbors?

yes21. What are you bad habits?

i chew my nails, avoid doing my laundry, and occasionally tell small lies to fuck with people22. Where would you like to travel?

Australia, Hong Kong, or Prague23. Do you have trust issues?

kinda24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

showering25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

my back26. What do you do when you wake up?

i lay in bed for a while27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

not really28. Who are you most comfortable around?

myself, alone. maybe my roommate29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

no30. Do you ever want to get married?

yes31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

no32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

I don’t think I’m cut out for anything but monogamy33. Spell your name with your chin.

msrj34. Do you play sports? What sports?

no35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yes37. What do you say during awkward silences?

very little38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

too many teeth, an unsettling aura that I’ve met them before, hazy outline, voice of legion, knows too much39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

big fan of Target, or Amazon if that counts. 40. What do you want to do after high school?

I am an actor.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

yes, don’t make it a third, that’s when I run out of mercy42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

white hot anger or extreme embarrassment

43. Do you smile at strangers?

yes44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

fear of dying having wasted my life, love of new stuff46. What are you paranoid about?

no one really loves me47. Have you ever been high?

yes48. Have you ever been drunk?

yes49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

no50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

grey51. Ever wished you were someone else?

no52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

know how to talk to people53. Favourite makeup brand?

sally hanson54. Favourite store?

see question 3955. Favourite blog?

its-me-goku56. Favourite colour?

red57. Favourite food? 

crab58. Last thing you ate?

pumpkin pie59. First thing you ate this morning?

french onion soup60. Ever won a competition? For what?

yes, best actor61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

no62. Been arrested? For what?

no63. Ever been in love? 

yes64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

we went and saw Gravity when it was in theaters. we held hands. I asked if I could kiss them. They said yes. We kissed. they tasted like popcorn.65. Are you hungry right now?

no66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

no67. Facebook or Twitter?

no68. Twitter or Tumblr?

no, and i don’t know why I stay on this hellsite69. Are you watching tv right now?

no70. Names of your bestfriends? 

mandy, graham, quadry, reed, emily71. Craving something? What?

affection72. What colour are your towels?

white72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

273. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

no74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

idk they sit upstairs in a bucket, maybe 30 but i havent looked at them in years75. Favourite animal?

i like narwhals, really into cats, big otter fan76. What colour is your underwear?

black77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

lemon cream79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

i’m not80. What colour pants?

i’m not81. Favourite tv show?

big question, right now Nathan for You82. Favourite movie?

Hot Fuzz83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Mean Girls84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

karen86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Dory87. First person you talked to today?

My sister88. Last person you talked to today?

my sister89. Name a person you hate?

I don’t hate anyone. maybe Donald Trump90. Name a person you love?

Steve Harrington91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

no92. In a fight with someone?

no93. How many sweatpants do you have?

294. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

like 5 or 695. Last movie you watched?

Thor Ragnarok96. Favourite actress?

Saoirse Rona97. Favourite actor?

myself98. Do you tan a lot?

no99. Have any pets?

4 cats100. How are you feeling?

ok101. Do you type fast?

not really102. Do you regret anything from your past?

sure103. Can you spell well?

W-E-L-L104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i’ve been to parties that had bonfires, so sure106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

yeah107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah, at summer camp108. What should you be doing?

sleeping109. Is something irritating you right now?

not really110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

yeah111. Do you have trust issues?

not really112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

i honestly don’t remember113. What was your childhood nickname?

didn’t have one114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yeah115. Do you play the Wii?

not recently116. Are you listening to music right now?

no117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

no118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes119. Favourite book?

the Diamond Age, Neal Stephenson120. Are you afraid of the dark?

no121. Are you mean?

I try not to be, but sometimes122. Is cheating ever okay?

no123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

no124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

no125. Do you believe in true love?

yes126. Are you currently bored?

no127. What makes you happy?

coffee, card games, good conversation128. Would you change your name?

yes129. What your zodiac sign?

capricorn, ox130. Do you like subway?

the sandwhich shop is edible but rarely if ever my first choice131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

depends on if i like them. if yes then sure132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

see question 10133. Favourite lyrics right now?

The World is a Vampire134. Can you count to one million?

i can but i won’t135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

that i don’t believe the moon exists136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed137. How tall are you?

6′2″138. Curly or Straight hair?

straight139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette140. Summer or Winter?

summer141. Night or Day?

night142. Favourite month?

October for climate, December for character143. Are you a vegetarian?

no144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

Dark145. Tea or Coffee?

Coffee146. Was today a good day?

yeah147. Mars or Snickers?

Snickers148. What’s your favourite quote?

“now is a bad time for making enemies” -Voltaire, on his deathbed being asked to reject the devil149. Do you believe in ghosts?

no150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“They had to hear Bilbo’s account of what happened to him twice over, before they were satisfied”

[aerialsquid]

This has been in my hard drive since 2012

Title: Auntipathy Fandom: Batman ‘66 Characters: Aunt Hilda, Marsha Queen of Diamonds, Chief O'Hara, Jonathan Crane (mentioned)

“Hilda Keeny. K-e-e-n-y.”

This wasn’t her first trip to the police station for aiding and abetting but the boys in blue were so polite here that it was hard to be angry about it. 

“We appreciate you testifying against your niece Marsha, Miss Hilda,” Chief O'Hara said. She’d finally talked him out of using her last name but refused to drop the title. “Not many people are willing to testify against family members.”

“It’s nothing she won’t be proud of, dearie. I’m sure she won’t mind.” Hilda adjusted the brim of her pointed black hat and smoothed out the wrinkles in her dress.

O'Hara shook his head and clicked his tongue. “Such a shame that she dragged you into the awful mess. You remind me a bit of my mother, God rest her.”

“Was she a nice woman?” asked Hilda, leaning forward with a carefully formed grandmotherly smile.

“An utter saint. Why, I remember the day I became a patrolman, and my mother said…”

The chief of police’s accent reminded Hilda of a young man she’d met on a boat to Great Britain, when she’d been willing to cross an entire ocean to get away from her own sainted mother, God rest her as far underground as possible.

O'Hara looked about fifty. Ezra was twenty-eight with hair as red as a sunset and a body beaten down until nothing but muscle was left. He’d played the fiddle and a few other things besides, and made the slow, stinking trip far more enjoyable for her. She’d almost taken the train to Ireland with him after they’d landed.Now she was in the most archcriminal-infested city in the country serving as accomplice to her rhinestoned niece Marsha, and while she couldn’t say she regretted anything it was fun to dwell on what might have been.

“A woman like you should be enjoying her golden years,” O'Hara was saying when she came back from her mental detour. “Playing with your grandchildren, maybe a little knitting. Not working for some greedy criminal–no offense to your niece.”

“No grandchildren, I’m afraid, Marsha’s all of I’ve got. But I do enjoy a bit of knitting.” And who said she wasn’t enjoying herself?

Yet again, Hilda was let out on probation. The kindly old lady misled by circumstances act worked every time, and Hilda was quite all right letting Marsha take the fall for her own actions. Besides, they were never careful enough to take Marsha’s makeup away and Marsha always laced her perfume with some of some of Hilda’s carefully prepared love potion. The dear girl was rarely in a cell longer than a day or two.

Besides, probation meant community service and community service meant cooking classes at Gotham State University. They’d never let Hilda be a chemistry professor again after her little 'experimenting on the student body’ incident but cooking was just chemistry one could eat.

She was busy cleaning up after a lecture on stir-fried vegetables (which could always be augmented with a bit of properly prepared crickets, dears) when a thin silhouette flickered by her office. Hilda put her spoons down and ducked her head out the door to watch him as he passed. She’d only caught his face for a moment but it had been a very familiar moment.

Skinny like a rail, pointed features like a bird, and an expression of mild loathing for the people around him. Hilda carefully tailed the young man until he entered his office in the psychology department and shut the door behind him. As she passed by she could hear the thud of him locking it tightly.

“Marsha, do we know a Jonathan Crane?” she asked her niece a few days later. “Only there’s a young man at the university who’s the spitting image of your grandfather.” Whose name had also been Jonathan.

The beast in the cauldron before her let out a loud burble. Hilda cooed and threw in another handful of dead mice, praising him every time he swallowed one without making a dreadful mess.

Mortimer was the accidental result of leaving a potion in the cauldron overnight. His skin was a slimy green with a mouth of needle teeth at one end and a spiney tail at the other. In between there was a set of thin legs that stayed folded up against his body, giving him the appearance of a paper mache snake walking around on pipecleaner limbs.

Also he made the most adorable purring noises when you petted his nose. He was Hilda’s little darling.

Marsha shrugged. She was dressed in that mod style that women found fashionable these days, with a grey Swarovski-studded shawl and a diamond hair comb holding back her hair. For herself, Hilda felt that black never went out of style and a pointed witch’s hat conveyed a certian sense of confidence and mystery. “The name doesn’t sound familiar.”

“Would you mind shaking your phone tree and seeing if you can find out who he is? That friend of yours with the umbrella seems to know half the city and I’m sure your host of admirers know the other half.”

“I’ll look into it.”

A few days later Marsha descended into her basement with a stern look on her face. Hilda squeezed a few more droplets of fluid into her newest potion and set her work aside.

“You were right about the professor,” Marsha said.

“Oh?”

“He’s covered up most of his past and his accent is pure Gotham, but they have his school records on file at the Gotham State University office and Bookworm has blackmail on the dean.” Marsha’s smile was tight, a mixture of victory and mild disgust. “Mr Crane went to high school in Georgia. That part of Georgia.”

Hilda winced. Poor child. “Right place, right timeline. But whose is he, I wonder.” She went digging in the mess of her worktable to find a spare piece of paper. Marsha came to huddle over beside her while she sketched out a diagram of a family tree.

Hilda’s mother Mary rested like the matriarchal tyrant she was at the top of the page. Below them were Marion, Sandra, and Hilda–though of course, Hilda was most likely scratched out of any family trees in the Keeny household. Sandra had only produced Marsha before throwing a rope over a water pipe and dancing on the end of it, and it spoke to Sandra’s character that Marsha didn’t feel herself greatly affected by it. Marion bore Karen and then went off to be some lady of high society, while Karen had cut and run from Mary’s decrepit steel clutches before she was old enough to drink.

There was a reason Marsha had no interest in having children, and that Hilda occasionally provided herbal assistance in this endeavor. The Keeny tree didn’t deserve to grow any further.

“Karen would be young but it would fit,” Marsha said, tracing the tree all the way to the bottom with her finger.

“And I do recall hearing that Mary had taken in some wretched child, gods and spirits protect his poor soul.”

“Karen got herself into a state, came home, dropped the baby on Grandma Mary, ran off again? The timeline fits. 'Crane’ could be the father’s name.”

Hilda gave a curt nod.  

“What are you going to do?” asked Marsha. “The rest of the family’s not even speaking to you and you’re not speaking to them.”

“Talk to him. The least he can do is not talk back.” Hilda reached for her pen again and drew in a few neat lines connecting Karen to “Unknown”, and a final one below to connect her to “Jonathan Crane”. “Besides, you’re a golddigger with a penchant for diamonds and chemically-aided seduction and I dress up as a witch while I concoct potions in your basement.”

Marsha grinned. “True. He might have turned out all right too.”

[booksareawayoflife]

One Of Us Is Lying by Karen M. McManus

‘FIVE STUDENTS WALK INTO DETENTION. ONLY FOUR LEAVE ALIVE.

Yale hopeful Bronwyn has never publicly broken a rule.

Sports star Cooper only knows what he’s doing in the baseball diamond.

Bad boy NATE is one misstep away from a life of crime.

Prom queen ADDY is holding together the cracks in her perfect life.

And outsider SIMON, creator of the notorious gossip app at Bayview High, won’t ever talk about any of them again.

He dies 24 hours before he could post their deepest secrets online. Investigators conclude it’s no accident. All of them are suspects.

Everyone has secrets, right?

What really matters is how far you’ll go to protect them.’

 Book Review: no spoilers

As soon as I heard the premise of this book, I had to have it. It seemed to be right up my alley. It was the Breakfast Club, meets Pretty Little Liars, and murder. Yet, I was slightly disappointed with this book, because it had potential to be a 5/5 for me.

When you think about murder, what do you think about? What is the first thing that comes to your mind? I’m guessing death by allergic reaction was not what you thought of. I was hoping for a murder with a bit more intrigue. So, that disappointed me from the start.

Then, the book doesn’t pick up until page 50. When the characters realise that it was murder, and not an accident. For those first 50 pages, it was boring me slightly. You had Simon’s death, but the death seemed quite mundane. Especially seeing as Simon gets taken away, and the characters believe that he could make it.

The twists in the book were also predictable. Yet, the killer was not, and I did enjoy the twist with the killer. It increased my rating for the book, otherwise this book would have been a predictable thriller for me.

I liked the execution of the media, the rumours, and the police investigation of the murder. I felt as if it was carried out quite well, and it made me want to read on.

In terms of the characters, I liked the main four narrators; Addy, Bronwyn, Cooper, and Nate. I felt as if Addy had the best character development in the book. I went from liking her the least, to liking her a lot. The character development felt genuine, as if it could actually happen to a person in real life. I liked Bronwyn. She reminded me a lot of Spencer Hastings from Pretty Little Liars, I loved her sister Maeve too. I was also shipping her and Nate. She was the brains behind solving the case. In terms of Cooper, I felt like he was the least developed. I felt like he was just meant to be the muscle of the group, and the popular boy. I wish we could have seen more of Kris, and him. I liked Cooper’s relationship with his grandmother. I loved Nate. Which is surprising, because I don’t usually like players, but I actually liked him. It does help with the fact that he stopped seeing other girls when he started to like Bronwyn.

Overall, I give this book a 8/10, or a 4/5. The book does have a slow start, but once you get into it, it grips you. I think you have to keep in mind that it is a Young Adult thriller, and so it is lighter than a normal, adult, thriller. I liked it, but I was slightly disappointed. I overhyped it for myself. I would recommend it to teenagers who wouldn’t normally pick up thrillers, or mysteries. I feel as if it is a good introduction to those genres. But, for those that read a lot of thrillers/mysteries, it could be a bit of a disappointment.

Love Lou xx

[florenciolampkin]

Compilation: Expert Tips From the 2019 Diamond Certified Directory

Photo: American Ratings Corporation ©2019

Earlier this month, we published the 2019 Diamond Certified Directory. Issued in 10 regional editions, it features full-page profiles of Diamond Certified companies throughout the Greater Bay Area. In addition, each directory includes a section that features helpful consumer tips provided by owners and managers of local Diamond Certified companies. To give you a sample, we’ve assembled the following compilation of expert tips gathered from the 10 different directory editions in print.

  Dr. Alfred dela Cruz

Owner, Alfred B. dela Cruz, DDS

A Solution for Sore Gums

If you suffer from sore or bleeding gums, the most important step you can take is to adopt a daily flossing routine. Keep in mind that when you first start flossing, it will cause your gums to bleed even more. However, with time, regular flossing will correct this issue, resulting in healthier gums.

  Frank Canova Jr.

President, Diablo Valley Cabinetry

Repairing Minor Cabinet Damage

Most minor dings, dents and scratches on cabinetry can be repaired using a cabinet touch-up kit. These kits usually come with a putty stick and a marker, which can be used to fill in dents and scratches and blend in the color. This allows you to “erase” minor blemishes and keep your cabinets looking pristine.

  Eva Kissova

Owner, Kiss Painting

Touching Up Exterior Door Paint

Repainting an exterior door can be an expensive job, especially if the paint has failed. A more cost-effective option is to service your door before the paint fails. Since the paint is still good, all that’s required is to add a new coat of varnish, a service that’s roughly one-third the cost of a full repainting job.

  Andy Bongiorno

Owner, Bongiorno Termite Control, Inc.

Preventing Insect Infestations

Factors like firewood piled up against the house, trees and shrubs touching the home exterior, and wall planters with high soil levels can increase the chances of an insect infestation. Remedy these conditions by storing firewood away from the home, keeping vegetation well-trimmed and monitoring the soil levels of wall planters.

  Eloy Baeza

Owner, Baeza Plumbing Service

Action Plan for a Major Water Leak

In the event of a major water leak, your first course of action should be to turn off the water at your home’s main shut-off valve. Next, open an exterior hose bib to relieve the pressure to the water going into the house. When you’ve successfully shut off the water, call a plumber to come out and repair the leak.

  Francisco Cortez

President, Green Environment Landscape, Inc.

Water-Wise Irrigation Tip

When irrigating lawns or plants situated in sloped areas, you can inadvertently waste a lot of water due to runoff. To prevent this, rather than watering for 10 minutes straight, water for five minutes, wait a couple of hours and then water for another five minutes. This will minimize runoff because you won’t oversaturate the soil.

  Karen Skinner

Senior Project Design Specialist, Viking Pavers

Paver Design Tip

Your paver installation may look great, but if it isn’t practical, you may wind up with unexpected frustrations. For example, if you have elderly family members who live with you or visit often, a cobblestone walkway isn’t a good choice—not only will it make using a walker or wheelchair difficult, it will increase the chances for falls.

  Gregg Campbell

Owner, B & L Glass Company

New Windows: Retrofit or Replace?

Replacing windows is no problem for wood-sided houses, thanks to trim that hides the damage caused by cutting out the old windows. However, it isn’t so simple for a brick or stucco house, since there’s no trim to conceal the damage. In these cases, it’s often more practical to retrofit the windows than replace them entirely.

  Eduardo Porta

Owner, Fremont Foreign Auto

Synthetic Oil Change Intervals

Many high-end car manufacturers are now recommending oil change intervals of 10,000 miles. However, even with synthetic oil, driving for this long without an oil change can lead to engine lubrication problems, especially if your car has more than 100,000 miles on the odometer. A safer oil change interval is 7,500 miles.

  Mike Ross

President, Ross Roofing & Construction, Inc.

Roof Repair Tip

Don’t overpay for temporary roof repairs. Sometimes it makes more financial sense to replace a damaged roof than to try and salvage it. A good guideline: When a repair begins to approach 20 percent of the cost of a complete reroof, consider reroofing.

  Jennifer Young

Owner, Elite Pro Home Cleaning

Stainless Steel Cleaning Tip

Most commercial stainless steel cleaning products either contain harsh chemicals or are made with mineral oil. A Greener, more affordable option for cleaning your stainless steel appliances is baby oil. Not only is baby oil environmentally friendly, you probably already have some at home, so you’ll save a little money.

  Sergey Ivanov

Owner, Serge Electric

Adding Electrical Outlets

If you use a lot of power strips and extension cords in your home, it might be time for an electrical upgrade. Besides the risk of overloading your circuits, it’s unsafe to have a lot of extension cords running through your home, so consider having some additional outlets installed—an affordable measure as far as upgrades go.

  Nick Granato

Owner, PremierGarage

Installing Garage Storage Cabinets

In most cases, it’s best to install garage storage cabinets above floor level. First, since they’re above the floor, it’s less easy for insects and rodents to get into them. Second, if your water heater and/or washing machine is located in the garage, raised cabinets will avert water damage if a major leak occurs.

  Gurjit Singh

Owner, Reliant Auto Repair

Replacing Your Car’s Water Pump

No vehicle component lasts forever, and water pumps are no exception. That’s why it’s good to replace your water pump preventatively rather than wait for it to fail. To minimize the cost, plan to replace your water pump at the same time you replace your timing belt—typically at the 90,000-mile mark.

  Chris Young

Sales Manager, J & M Windows & Glass, Inc.

Adjusting Sliding Door Alignment

Besides regularly cleaning and lubricating your sliding door’s track, it’s a good idea to periodically check its alignment. Most sliding glass doors have a couple of knobs at the bottom that allow you to adjust the alignment. Open your door slightly and check its alignment with the track; if it seems off, use the knobs to adjust it.

  Russell Calhoon

Project Manager, Paradigm Concrete & Construction

Hosing Down New Concrete

If you feel inclined to hose down newly installed concrete, be sure to do it at night. When concrete is hosed off during the day, the water will evaporate and leave a blotchiness or efflorescence. While this can often be cleaned off with a vinegar/water solution, it’s best to avoid it in the first place.

  Debby Benson-Miller

Real Estate Agent, Prime Real Estate Services

Getting Pre-Approved for a Loan

The first step in your home search should be getting pre-approved for a loan, as this will allow you to act fast when you find a property you want to buy. Your best route to getting pre-approved is through a mortgage broker, who can approach multiple lenders and find one that’s able to work with your particular circumstances.

  Sean Madar

Owner, Atticare

One Reason to Inspect Your Attic

One reason to inspect your attic is to rule out rodent infestation. Rodents can cause a lot of problems in the attic, from chewing on insulation and electrical wires to leaving droppings, the latter of which can impact indoor air quality. To prevent this, inspect your attic annually and have any issues addressed by a professional.

  David Robb

Owner, Robb & Messer Moving and Storage

Packing Tips for a Move

When packing for a move, try to pack boxes as tightly as you can. Besides being an efficient use of space, this will reduce the chances of breakage caused by items shifting around during transit. On the other hand, when packing large boxes, avoid overfilling them with heavy items, as this can cause their bottoms to fall out.

  Lamine Elabed

President, LW Construction & Handyman Services

Fixing Low Water Pressure in a Faucet

If you’re getting unusually low water pressure from a faucet in your home, it may be due to a clogged aerator. To fix the problem, simply unscrew the aerator from the faucet, clean out any sediment inside and tighten it back into place. You should immediately notice an improvement in water pressure.

  If you’d like to receive the Diamond Certified Directory at your home or workplace, click here. By signing up to become a Diamond Certified Preferred Consumer, you’ll receive the Diamond Certified Directory (as well as quarterly Diamond Certified Directory Updates) and several other benefits, including a double Diamond Certified Performance Guarantee. Membership is ALWAYS FREE, so don’t hesitate—sign up today!

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